Thor 3D

Chris Helmsworth as Thor in THOR

★★★★★★★★★★

THOR Hammers His Way Into Your Heart!

I predict that the surprise hit Thor is destined to be the biggest summer movie so far! Coming down to us mere mortals from Hollywood's heaven, Kenneth Branaugh's brilliant adaptation of a comic book is a rollicking, hang-on-to-your-pants epic adventure that grabs you and doesn't let go until it wants to.  

The story, adapted from the timeless Marvel comic book "The Almighty Thor", starts from the very beginning of the movie and doesn't let up until the climatic finish.  Thor, apparently the god of lightning, is sent down to Earth as punishment for something he did to his father Odin, King of Assgard (Anthony Hopkins). Once on Earth, Thor learns what it means to be a true hero when he must fight a giant robot.  

Kenneth Branaugh's brilliant direction is is nothing short of brilliant, and brings to the screen the kind of brilliance that only he can bring to the screen. Chris Helmsworth plays Thor with the same kind of power and glory that he brought to this role of the guy who dies at the beginning of Star Trek. Sir Anthony Hopkins is perfect, in the best performance of his career since the last time he played a king. Natalie Portman is unforgettable, and Stellan Skaarssgaaard rounds out the cast as only he can. And as a bonus, we get a sneak peek into The Avengers, and I for one can't wait to see what Thor will do with John Steed and Emma Peel.

Put it all together and you get a timeless classic so entertaining, you won't believe until you see it!  I for one plan to!  

G.I. JOE - The Rise of the Cobra

The elite G.I. Joe Team (above, bottom) takes on the sinister Cobra squad in G.I. JOE: RISE OF THE LYCANS.

Terrific Movie From Head to Toe!

There's been a lot of talk in the press on how the good folks at Paramount haven't allowed film critics like me to screen G.I. Joe - Rise of the Machines before actual people get to see it on opening day.  I say, "Big deal!"  that's never stopped me from giving a movie the review it deserves, and this is one that deserves everything it gets.  Audiences everywhere will stand up at the end of G.I. Joe!

Deep under the North or South Pole, an evil genius, probably named Cobra, steals some high-tech weaponry and unleashes it on both the civilized world and France.  General Hawk (Dennis Quaid) quickly assembles a team of the hottest-looking actors he can find to form an elite fighting squad, the G.I. Joe team, driven by duty, honor and the ten-inch plastic dolls they played with as children.

Dennis Quaid as General Hawk in G.I. JOE: RISE OF TAJ Director Stephen Sommers brings the same craft and sensitivity to the film as he did with The Mummy. Compared to the thrilling Transformers series, the action figures here seem somewhat more warm and nearly human in their realism. And Dennis Quaid delivers the performance of a lifetime as a guy who gives orders and talks on a headset, and  cements his place in Hollywood as the Guy You Get Now That Harrison Ford's Too Old.

Full of surprises and many different scenes, G.I. Joe: Rise of the Silver Surfer is non-stop from start to finish.  it's the most electrifying toy-based movie of the year! it's an awsome fun wild ride that's so much wild fun, it's awsome!

Harry Potter And the Half-Blooded Prince

 Daniel Ratliffe (left) and another cast member look on in "Hairy Potter and the Half-Blood Prince"

More Potterific Than Ever Before!

Harry's back!  Bigger and bolder, smarter and sassier, louder and more magically delicious than ever!  Fans of J.K. Rowlings's collection of children's stories will be delighted to hear that his almost magical stories of wizards and people are finally coming to the big screen, and this installment, Hairy Potter And the Half-Blood Prince, should make a lot of fans sit up and take notice.  Not only is HPAtHBP the best movie in the series by far so far, it's so much better than the book, you might just leave the theater saying to yourself, "Hey, that book is a pile of crap!"

It's modern day London and evil wizards are deliberately causing bad weather and civil engineering failures. In steps kindly Professor Dumbledog to save the day.  Young Harry and his pals get into mischief, and the Dark Lord (who riveted us in Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers, The Return of the King) uses all his powers to stop them.  The story's very deep, rich and complex and has hints of a world where magic actually is real, which should delight children of all ages and stereotypes.  Alan Rickman delivers the best performance of his career as the sneering Professor Snipe, a subtle rendering of the mythical ambiguous villain so powerful, I may have to actually go and see it. Emma Watson is riveting as a young woman, though conflicted and confused, can knock your ass off your backside with her wand. Rupert Grunt is hysterical as the befuddled upperclassman Ron Isley.   Dame Maggie Smith rounds out the cast. 

HPAtHBP will cast a spell over you so powerful, it's haunting, nightmarish, near-Satanic delight will leave you with a smile on your face, then plague your soul until you die. This is tour-de-force filmmaking of such bravura and nom de plume, it is destined to be the sine qa non of the sui generis ne plus ultra.  And it's this critic's humble opinion that for the next seven novels, instead of churning out long tedious books that people actually have to read to enjoy, Mr. Rowlings should consider going direct to the big screen.

ICE AGE: DAWN OF THE DINOSAURS

An animal (above) stares into the jaws of another animal, in "Ice Age: Rise of the Dinosaurs"

This Ice Age will Warm your Heart!!!

I'll have to admit, that when the first few minutes of this film unspooled, I was disappointed. All the mayhem, the screaming, things flashing by the screen so fast I felt like I'd begin to convulse! But then I realized that I was in the theater that was screening Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. The names are so similar I got mixed up. But when I finally got to the right screen and saw the last ten minutes, I was, just like you'll be, doubled over with laughter! Ice Age: Revenge of the Dinosaurs is without a doubt the funniest comedy of the year so far by far! Forget that I said the same thing  about Hangover, and Up and Year One and Night at the Museum and The Taking of Pelham 123; this is it, a movie so big and so funny, two dimensions couldn't contain it all! You'll laugh yourself into another dimension as these "out-there" animal characters go from one crazy predicament to the next. Get ready for some Tyrannosaurus-sized fun!

The sub zero heroes are back. Scrat is still trying to nab the ever elusive nut, while maybe finding true love. Manny and Ellie await the birth of their mini-mammoth. Diego the saber toothed tiger wonders if he'€™s growing too soft and Sid the sloth gets into trouble when he creates his own makeshift family by hijacking some dinosaur eggs. On a mission to rescue the hapless Sid, the gang ventures into a mysterious underground world, where they have some close encounters with dinosaurs, battle flora and fauna, run amuck and meet a relentless, one eyed, dino-hunting weasel named Buck!

I don't know what any of that means, but it all adds up to a warm, witty, laugh-out-loud comedy the whole family can enjoy! You'll laugh your nuts off with Ice Age: Revenge of the Dinosaurs!

PUBLIC ENEMIES

Johnny Depp (above, with gun) shoots his way onto the big screen in "Pubic Enemies"

Public Enemies Will Massacre You With Quality!

Director Michael Mann and star Johnny Depp have teamed up to craft a legendary crime movie so well crafted, so relevant to our times, it will without a doubt be considered by at least one person to be one of the best films ever made!

It's 1930-something.  The nation is ravaged by too much depression and not enough medication.  Tired of being poor, the dashing John Dillinger takes control of his finances and stages a daring streak of bank robberies across this great nation of ours.  Employing the likes of Pretty Face Nelson and Baby Boy Floyd, Dillinger becomes a sort of folk hero, a Bonnie and Clyde only without the Bonnie, until he meets up with French seductress Marion Cotillard, who plays his new girlfriend.  The press package tells me that the film follows the bloody rise of this folk hero, whose story, ultimately, inevitably, and indefatigably, comes to an end. 

Johnny Depp is poised to steal the Oscar in this once-in-a-lifetime performance. There seems to be no trace of his heavy accent, which has plagued him in such movies as Pirates of the Caribbean. Here, at least in the previews,  Depp delivers a performance so powerful it leaps right off the YouTube page. Christian Bale shines in the role as the relentless FBI agent Melvin Peebles.   Marion Cotillard delivers a performance so seductive and powerful, you may forget that she's really French.

This is filmmaking at its most compelling, its most raw, its most masterfullest.  And when I eventually see the movie, I have no doubt that I'll declare it the best movie of the year.